That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
