You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Boobs are out for the taking
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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