So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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