see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize