I smell stomach acid.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
