Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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