Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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