good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
