Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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