My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
