when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
