ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
