Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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