You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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