Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize