Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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