i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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