Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Farmville is her only friend.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
