I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
BRING THE BAGELS
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
