In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
