Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
