The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
