when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
