Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
