I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
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