Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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