wat bout pragnant strippers??
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Randomize
