so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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