A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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