at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize