I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
