Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
