it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
