Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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