Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
