thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Are my feet made of real feet?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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