Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
My vagina just recognized that song.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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