would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize