Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
