I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
