I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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