What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
