Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
