Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
