Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
