State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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