She is in my trunk
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Someone signed my nipple.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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