Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Randomize
