Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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