Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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