Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
